not the blog of NICK GRIFFIN MEP

Sorry I've Been Away...

2010-06-28T08:52:00.000-07:00

I've been doing the day job since the end of last year (working on a film that I promise you'll enjoy in 2012...), and have had to restrict my activities to observing, rather than participating. Unfortunately, this state of affairs is likely to continue as we enter the “Begging For Money” stage ("Pre - Production" - going very well, thanks...), move onto the the “Actually Making a Film” stage (in the East Midlands and France – Autumn 2011) and the “Bloody Hell! How Much Do They Want For The Rights To A Jam Track?! We Only Want To Use 30 Seconds Of It On The Soundtrack – Not Have Paul Sodding Weller Sing It Live In The Bloody Cinema!!” stage (AKA “Post – Production”).

In the meantime; Thought I might as well drone on a little about my motivation for all this.

You're probably going to be bored. Very bored.

* * * * * * * *

I'm Marxist, UAF, Searchlight, scum.

Apparently.

Despite the fact that I've never been a member of any Marxist organisation, or Unite against Fascism, and have never even read a copy of Searchlight, in the unique mindset of many (possibly even the majority of) BNP Supporters, because I happen to believe that racism is wrong, multiculturalism is healthy, and those who would seek to divide our nation along ethnic lines have no place in a modern society, I'm all of the above, and more.

Apparently.

Because I would question the legality of Nick Griffin's level of dictatorial control over his collection of rag-tag racists, misfits, oddballs and disaffected unemployables, because I would argue that his financial dealings with the same are less than honest, and because I would suspect that his own view of the Party is as a means of bankrolling a lifestyle the vast majority of his Members can only dream of, I am one of “The Sheeple”.

Interesting term, that: There are, I guess, quite a few “Sheeple” in the world. We're the ones who (in the mythology of the BNP) resisted the temptation to “Save Our Once-Great Nation” by not voting for them in May. We're the ones who prefer to watch mindless movies, soaps and talent shows – served up by a “Foreign – Controlled” (and you know what that's code for...) media - that portray a “Multiculti” Britain. We're the ones who actually choose to believe much of the news served up by the “Mainstream Media”, and who dare to listen to whatever music we happen to like, from whichever cultural background we like and from whichever Artistes we enjoy.

We, the Sheeple, are pretty easygoing, in fact.

If only we could learn to believe in Nick Griffin and not to question his every move. Every day, this Great Leader must put his very life on the line (Britain is full of would – be assassins, it seems) to defend an uncaring world against a Marxist Government (led by an old Etonian, Thatcherite multi millionaire – but that's a mere detail), the attempts of a similarly Marxist Government Quango to fine or imprison him (on the flimsy pretext that he has “Broken the Law”) and the various traitors within his own Party, all working for that sinister branch of the Security Services known as “Searchlight Magazine” and paid for their treachery in £20 Tesco vouchers.

The most faithful of Griffin's coterie - that small band of keyboard warriors led by Paul “Green Arrow” Morris and Roger “Wellard67” Phillips – perform ever more extraordinary acts of supplication for the benefit of their Messiah: Filming streets in London with a higher-than-the-national-average proportion of non – White Brits to “prove” their primary article of faith that Britain is being “Colonised” by an “Invasion Force” dedicated to changing the very fundamentals of our way of life within the next decade or two. These poorly – made and laughably inauthentic videos are spread throughout cyberspace in a matter hours: Seized upon and linked to on blogs, talkboards and forae by the “White Nationalist Community” and revered like fragments of the True Cross – as tangible proof (as if any were needed) that they have been right all along and that their worship of (and ongoing financial offerings to) the Dear Leader can only have one possible outcome: Eventual Victory.

And victory means?

A grateful nation made whole again. Independent of Europe and united, once more, under a benevolent Leader dedicated to rolling back the years to a Golden Age when tow-headed schoolboys would sit quietly (under threat of firm, but fair, corporal punishment), learning times tables and the dates of English History by rote, before going home to play traditional games in streets saved from predators by the reintroduction of the death penalty and watched over by a friendly (if stern) Bobby on the beat who won't be wasting his time any more with such non – crimes as “Racist Attacks” or “Domestic Violence”. Later in the evening, of course, we'll sit down, as a nation, to enjoy such tv treats as Jim Davidson the Black and White Minstrels while tucking into proper fish and chips – wrapped in good honest newspaper like it was before the namby – pamby, 'elf n' safety, Marxists took control of our national dish. Ah, halcyon days...

As for me?

I'm sorry, but I'm perfectly content to be a Sheeple. If the alternative is filling an otherwise empty life with hatred, intolerance and blind subservience to someone the rest of the Country recognises as a cheap conman with all the subtlety, charm and guile of a 419 scam, then Sheeple is perfectly good enough for me. In fact, my right to live in peaceful coexistence with my fellow Sheeple is so important to me that I'll happily write, march, shout, laugh and argue about it until we can ALL be Sheeple, and the likes of Griffin, Butler, Darby, Colgate, Bennett, Morris, Phillips, Brons, Bowden, Voysey, Riley – Ward, and the rest of the sorry crew have been shown the door.

I'M BACK! WITH AN OFFER YOU CAN'T REFUSE!!

2009-12-04T03:16:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

I must apologise for having been away so long: What with MY MOMENTOUS APPEARANCE at the so-called “Climate Change” Summit in Copenhagen (immortalised in the famous song by Hans Christian Anderson and sung in the musical film by Peter Kaye – Wonderful, Wonderful Chicago) and my UNENDING AND, FRANKLY, SUPERHUMAN EFFORTS to get this month's expenses claim in on time, I've been a tad busy!

Anyway, the downside to all of this TOP LEVEL INTERNATIONAL STATESMANSHIP has been leaving OUR GREAT PARTY and, more importantly, MY GREAT BLOG, in the hands of my LOYAL DEPUTY, Mr Darby.

Being something of a GADGET LOVER, Mr Darby proceeded to change all the settings on my trusty old Sinclair ZX81, to such a degree that it would NO LONGER FUNCTION when I inserted a tape!

“About time you came into the 21st Century!” was Mr Darby's reaction to my ENTIRELY JUSTIFIED RAGE.

And so that's JUST WHAT I'VE DONE! AND YOU CAN JOIN ME!!

Thanks to a bulk purchase of the VERY LATEST IN CUTTING-EDGE COMPUTING TECHNOLOGY by Mr Kemp, we now have OUR VERY OWN, BRANDED PC!

Mr Kemp's business contacts in VARIOUS EASTERN EUROPEAN SOCIAL ORGANISATIONS have enabled him to purchase TWELVE THOUSAND of these MAGNIFICENT COMPUTING BEHEMOTHS.

We just need to sell ONE EACH to our ENTIRE MEMBERSHIP to pay for the ENTIRE SHIPMENT! By next month, if you don't mind. As Mr Kemp joked; “these are the kind of social organisations you don't want to keep waiting for their money!”

So there you have it: This FINE COMPUTER (see advert) can be YOURS for a mere £2500!

Cash only please. I've not been away so long I've forgotten the score!

GREETINGS FROM SPAIN: WHERE I AM LOVED AND REVERED ALMOST AS MUCH AS IN BRITAIN!

2009-11-25T01:52:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

Just returned from Spain, where I fulfilled a duty of my role as INTERNATIONAL STATESMAN by addressing a conference of our Hispanic brethren, “Los Fascistos Idioticos”.

This PATRIOTIC GROUP, under their RESPECTED LEADER Manuel “El Generalissimo” Morona, has long been at the FOREFRONT of EUROPEAN POLITICS since the demise of the WIDELY – LOVED and REVERED Francisco Franco, who led that GREAT NATION through an era of UNPARALLELLED WEALTH and RESPECT.

Unfortunately, my trip was marred, slightly, by an appearance from a rival group of SPANISH PATRIOTS - “El Racistas Loco” who, it was explained to me by Mr Collett, were simply jealous that I wasn't gracing THEIR conference with my presence!

Sometimes, being so widely loved can be a burden, you know!

Anyway. In my absence, our GREAT PARTY was safe in the capable (but not TOO capable! We don't want him getting any ideas!) hands of my loyal deputy, Mr Darby, who – much in the manner of THE TRAITOR GORDON BROWN's occasional exercise of taking his “Cabinet” to different parts of the Country – chose to exercise his control of the reins of power from a derelict shed on the island of LUNDY, accompanied only by his trusty “Spotters Guide To Indigenous And Not At All Foreign BRITISH Birds” and customary four cases of (South African – obviously!) Lidl wine.

An unusual location from which to run OUR GREAT PARTY, I'll grant you but, thanks to the wonders of his “iPhone”, he was able to keep an eye on things just as surely as if he'd been AT THE VERY HEART OF OUR NATION; in London, say, or Llanfyl. I daresay he'd be just as capable of fulfilling his duties if we sent him to Ulan Bator!

Which – he doesn't know it yet – is a distinct possibility!

Anyway, Mr Darby was able to keep me informed of his goings-on via the medium of “text messages”, even though his lack of a signal led to a certain degree of “drop-out”.

One such message, for instance, read: “Gr*****, you f*t, wonk* - yed t*at – get your w*bbly ar*e back h*re r**ht now a*d start d**ng what we f***ing p*y you f*r!”

Unfortunately, I haven't yet decoded that one yet, but I'm sure it was just another message of LOVE and FRATERNAL SUPPORT from a loyal lieutenant!

MR RICHARD BARNBROOK: AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT!

2009-11-21T05:48:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

Not to beat about the bush (in a THRASHING sort of a way, of course – not “Beating” like how I'm going to “Beat” Mrs Hodge!), but there's been a degree of LOOSE TALK flying around the NATIONALIST TALKBOARDS - “Stormdrain”, “Home of the Green Goblin” and the like – suggesting that I, BRITAIN'S GREATEST PATRIOT, have somehow put Mr Barnbrook's nose out of joint by taking my HEROIC DECISION to stand in Barking, rather than Thurrock, in the forthcoming Election.

Well, let me state, for the record, that NOTHING COULD BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH!

Mr Barnbrook has been a loyal Party Member for many years. He is, indeed, the kind of INTELLECTUAL our GREAT PARTY needs, with his cultured background in ARTHOUSE CINEMA and his VALUED FRIENDS AMONG THE ARTISTIC ELITE of our GREAT NATION.

In fact, I recently watched one of his examples of Artistic Cinema - “Hello Sailor – Erotic Adventures With Seamen” - and was immediately struck by the quality of the lighting, the fine, if sparse, script and the pin-sharp cinematography. Especially impressive was the Cameraman's STARTLING ability to operate his equipment seemingly one – handed during many of the “Action” sequences.

(The film can be purchased from our Marketing Division – Excalibur Remaindered Goods & House Clearances, Ltd. Look in the “Adult” Section.)

No. The fact remains that I, and OUR GREAT PARTY AS A WHOLE, have nothing but the DEEPEST ADMIRATION for Mr Barnbrook, and his TYPICALLY GENEROUS, and ENTIRELY UNPROMPTED decision to lay down his own (frankly, hopeless, if truth be told) political ambitions for the GREATER GOOD. Which, in this case, is ME!

Furthermore, LET IT BE SAID that there is ABSOLUTELY NO TRUTH in the SCURRILOUS AND LIBELLOUS RUMOUR that a certain Party only reached his decision to withdraw from the Seat after “Pressure” - involving certain “threatened” leaks to the press concerning certain “embarrassing” photographs taken on the set of an early Cinematic Work starring a certain GLA Member and a certain Ray “The Fister” McQueeny – was applied.

Nonsense. During a quiet drink - no more than the customary five or eight bottles of Lambrini – our friend simply decided to STEP ASIDE FOR THE BETTER MAN. Before quietly, and with his customary DIGNITY and GOOD GRACE, falling asleep beneath the table.

Of course, it's not as though OUR GREAT PARTY would EVER leave such an ASSET as Mr Barnbrook HIGH AND DRY!

Oh no! While I campaign to win the HEARTS AND MINDS OF THE GREAT CONSTITUENTS OF BARKING (Thurrock), Mr Barnbrook will be charged with the VITAL TASK of ensuring that OUR GREAT PARTY takes control of the HEART OF POLITICAL POWER IN OUR GREAT CAPITAL that is the Barking and District Cycle Paths & Dog Wardens Sub – Committee!

He even has a DEDICATED FIGHTING FUND to achieve this GREAT GOAL! A PRINCELY SUM of almost £8, WHICH HE IS EMPOWERED TO SPEND ON HIS TITANIC CAMPAIGN IN ANY WAY HE SEES FIT!

A PROUD DAY FOR OUR GREAT PARTY: OUR FIRST ETHNIC MEMBER!

2009-11-20T01:56:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

As our GREAT PARTY adapts and adjusts to the new Membership Rules FORCED UPON US by the snivelling, cowardly, Marxist LibLabCon Elite, I'm PROUD to announce that we are preparing to WELCOME (in a manner of speaking) our FIRST ETHNIC MEMBER!

This Gentleman, whose name is long and unpronounceable – and certainly impossible to SPELL!- has long been a friend to our BAND OF BROTHERS, and will, I'm sure, prove himself a MOST USEFUL MARKETING TOOL in our EPIC STRUGGLE against the FORCES OF DARKNESS, motivated, as he is, by A LOVE OF HIS (or OUR) COUNTRY, allied to a good degree of identity confusion, a profound lack of intelligence and a murderous hatred of Islam.

Of course, we must remember now (because we've conveniently forgotten before) the DEBT OF GRATITUDE owed by OUR GREAT NATION to Ethnics who, in time of war, have RALLIED TO THE BANNER!

One such HERO was the great Amin Al Husseini who, in 1941, during our darkest days, travelled from his dusty homeland to JOIN THE FIGHT against THE SPREADING DARKNESS.

Eventually, Mr Al Husseini MADE HIS MARK in history by recruiting THOUSANDS of his fellow countrymen to the Cause, forming units who served WITH DISTINCTION in North Africa, the Balkans and Eastern Europe.

WE COULD DO WITH A FEW MORE LIKE AMIN AL HUSSEINI!

FELLOW BRITONS: AN APPEAL! (For a change...)

2009-11-18T05:41:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

The gloves are off! For too long now the treacherous political and media establishment has flooded our tiny paradise with IMMIGRANTS, COMMUNISTS and QUISLING FIFTH COLUMNISTS, betrayed us and sold us out to the COMMUNISTIC EU EMPIRE, allowed our green and pleasant land to degenerate into a HOODIE-FILLED SHOPPING CENTRE, and has treated our people like WE OUGHT TO BE TREATING ALL OF THEM! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH, THE FIGHT BACK BEGINS!

The LibLabCon establishment has watched with amazement and horror at the steady rise of our GREAT PARTY. It was not too long ago that we didn't possess a single elected representative at any level anywhere! Now things have changed, we have over 100 parish, borough, district and county councillors, a seat on the Greater London Assembly, seats in the European Parliament, a working majority on the Daily Mail Comments Board and TOTAL CONTROL of the Chertsey & District Scale Modelling Club!

Recent opinion polls in the wake of MY HEROIC STAND AGAINST THE FORCES OF DARKNESS on Question Time put us on 85% of the vote (if only certain factors – like disregard for truth – are taken into account)! The Marxist LibLabCon enemies of OUR GREAT NATION are sick with worry that we could pull off the horror to end all horrors: TO WIN A SEAT IN PARLIAMENT. Can you imagine ME sitting in the House of Commons? Can you imagine the SIZE of my expense claims? Can you imagine the SCALE of my pension?

Time to challenge the traitors at Westminster!

The establishment are so terrified of our forthcoming, and ABSOLUTELY GUARANTEED victory that they have tried to finish us off through membership freezes, huge legal costs, constant media attacks and AT LEAST FIVE ASSASSINATION ATTEMPTS AND COUNTLESS DEATH THREATS AGAINST ALL OF YOU THAT I HAVE JUST MADE UP IN ORDER TO FRIGHTEN YOU FOR THE PURPOSES OF THIS BLOG!

That's why your financial support is not only appreciated, IT IS ABSOLUTELY CRITICAL TO MY ELECTION CAMPAIGN AND MY OWN FINANCIAL SUCCESS!
WE MUST, FOR MY CHILDREN'S SAKE, SEIZE THIS GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY WITH BOTH HANDS AND SHOW THE WORLD WHAT TRUE, DOUGHTY BRITS CAN ACHIEVE AGAINST THE ODDS!
AGAINST ALL THE ODDS, YOU HAVE FALLEN FOR THESE APPEALS AGAIN AND AGAIN THROUGHOUT OUR PROUD HISTORY - ITS TIME YOU DID IT AGAIN!

For the last couple of days, the media has been awash with small articles in sidebars over my HEROIC decision to stand in the constituency of Barking (Thurrock) in the forthcoming General Election. This has terrified the cowering, Marxist, LibLabCon Elite opposition, because Barking (Thurrock) was our best result in 2005. I, once again, am not fighting this election to gain decent votes in certain areas – I AM FIGHTING TO STOP RICHARD BARNBROOK GETTING A BITE OF THE CHERRY, AND I WANT YOU BY MY SIDE!

Time is running out - the time for action is NOW!
We are running out of time - it's as simple as that. We cannot afford to stand still! Some imaginary experts say that, thanks to mass immigration and high Muslim birth-rates, we will pass the point of "No Return" in a mere SIX WEEK'S time. YES, ONLY SIX WEEKS LEFT UNTIL IT IS GAME OVER FOR OUR CHILDREN!

Then they will be condemned to live under a Muslim led regime, FORCED, at the POINT OF A BAYONET, to wear BURQUAS and EAT FALAFELS. MAY (the CHRISTIAN!) GOD HELP OUR LOVED ONES!

Therefore I cannot afford to throw away a single election. YOU must mobilise and fight this campaign until your fingers are sore and swollen from leafleting, your throats are bleeding and infected from canvassing, and your pockets are empty from financing a highly sophisticated campaign the likes of which OUR GREAT AND PROUD NATION has never seen since the days of the great HORATIO BOTTOMLEY. I have four children, and I am TERRIFIED for their future the way things are going with our finances. I am going to throw myself into this campaign unlike any other fundraising exercise I have ever been involved in.

I have no doubt that the STOUT and HARDY members and activists that make up our GREAT PARTY are with me, and will work ceaselessly until the final hour to ensure the survival of our nation and MY CONTINUING FINANCIAL WELLBEING!

What we need:

Determination, Dedication and Resolve

One thing that worries me, as always, is the finances for this election campaign and, indeed, my RETIREMENT. Our enemies on the far-left, the trade unions, the forces of darkness, the Satanic Hordes of Saruman and the treacherous parties across the spectrum are going to be pouring enormous financial resources into a gigantic campaign. The media will unleash a titanic smear campaign once again leading up to polling day. I must prepare my retirement plan NOW, and that costs money.

To fight against this broad anti-British coalition of the entire Marxist, LibLabCon, Elite Sith Lord's establishment, OUR GREAT PARTY depends on the small and generous backing of our members, supporters and voters. This will, without a doubt, be another lopsided contest, just like the European Election, the Ewoks against the mighty Galactic Empire on the Forest Moon of Endor and the HEROIC STAND AT MICKEY RORKE'S DRIFT, as Sir “Citizen” Caine and a handful of BRAVEHEARTED BRITISH character actors defeated the ENTIRE APACHE NATION. But just as then, we must fight like RABID LIONS and emerge VICTORIOUS!

I have no doubt that it can be done - but we must start early and we must work twice as hard as normal. These are exceptional times we are enduring - this is HISTORY IN THE MAKING! We are treading the path of British history standing defiant against the treacherous vermin destroying, dismantling and abolishing our Great Island Nation. We are fighting for our CHILDREN, our GRAND-CHILDREN, our GREAT GRAND-CHILDREN, our GREAT – GREAT GRAND-CHILDREN and our GREAT - GREAT - GREAT – GRAND-CHILDREN!

Victory is within sight - NOW is the time!

Can you imagine how you would feel if you IGNORED this post and I lost out on winning a Parliamentary seat and the salary for life that entails by just a few votes? Votes that we could have got if only YOU had sold your house and donated the proceeds to my campaign fund?

That is why it is so very important to contribute to my 'Election Campaign Fund' with a gift of £20, £50, £100 or even £500 or £1,000. I am ready for this fight… ARE YOU WITH ME?

I am depending on you to dig deep and make the biggest sacrifice you can. I am counting on a few large special gifts but I am also depending on multiple gifts of £25, £35, £50, £100 and £200. Just send whatever you can – and then the same again, and then some MORE - straight away.

Your contribution might mean the difference between a lonely, embittered old age and a comfortable, prosperous future… I really cannot afford the luxury of your not giving enough!

You MUST respond urgently to this post. NOBODY ELSE CAN LEAD OUR PARTY (carefully worded constitutional changes have made sure of that!) - there is no 'Plan B' – despite what Simon Darby might think. It's up to us to stand shoulder to shoulder in defence of our GREAT NATION, and I want you to STAND WITH ME (although not for Barking (Thurrock), obviously – THAT shot at a seat is ALL MINE!) in this campaign. The future of my children and my children's children depends on what we do now!
Cash and Cheques to the usual address, etc, etc...

OUR HISTORIC CONFERENCE: FULL REPORT!

2009-11-16T02:19:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

And so we come to the end of our HISTORIC CONFERENCE!

Not only have we made the constitutional membership changes (see collector's plate offer below) required to make our GREAT PARTY a SHINING LIGHT of TOLERENCE and EQUALITY for the ENTIRE WORLD TO FOLLOW, but we have adopted, also, a RAFT OF POLICIES guaranteed to make our GREAT PARTY the ONLY sensible alternative to the CORRUPT, MORALLY BANKRUPT, LibLabCon Marxist Elite!

The Economy.

We will SAVE our GREAT NATION'S crumbling economy by IMMEDIATELY ENDING ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION!

Europe.

We will earn the UNDYING RESPECT AND LOYALTY of all our Continental Cousins by HAVING NOTHING MORE TO DO WITH THEM (apart from our close links with the Hungarian Yobbik Party, the French Socialistes Nationale, the Danish Kristiaan White People's Skynhuud Alliance and the German Fuhrerbund Party, obviously), and IMMEDIATELY ENDING ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION!

The NHS.

By sacking ALL managers in the NHS, and turning the care of our GREAT NATION'S health needs over to grumpy, no-nonsense matrons with pre-1950 ideas on morality in all issues relating to teenage pregnancy, sex before marriage and ERUPTIVE ULCERATIONS OF THE GENERATIVE PARTS, we shall usher in a GOLDEN AGE of HEALTH, HAPPINESS and SEXUAL REPRESSION unseen since the GLORY DAYS of the late 19th Century! Oh, that and IMMEDIATELY ENDING ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION!

Defence.

Our GLORIOUS ARMED FORCES will ONLY be employed, henceforth, to enforce our policy of IMMEDIATELY ENDING ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION!

Education.

By IMMEDIATELY ENDING ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION, allied to a policy of removing ALL COMPUTERS from our schools, and re-drawing the curriculum to consist of a balanced mix of FUNDAMENTALIST CHRISTIANITY, MANLY SPORTS (for the boys – cookery and making beds properly with Hospital Corners – NO DUVETS – for the girls) and LEARNING THE DATES OF THE KINGS & QUEENS OF ENGLAND BY ROTE, we shall ensure that OUR GREATEST RESOURCE - THE FUTURE OF OUR GLORIOUS NATION – are ready to LEAD THE WORLD once again!

Housing.

Obvious. We will IMMEDIATELY END ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION!

The Environment.

We will IMMEDIATELY END ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION!

Contact With Extraterrestrial, Pandimensional Entities.

We will, with immediate effect upon achieving power, make contact with alien lifeforms and join them in creating a vast galactic federation dedicated to peace, justice and IMMEDIATELY ENDING ALL FORMS OF non-white IMMIGRATION. This policy was proposed by Mr Lee Barnes LLD Hons, and we thought it best to humour him, quite frankly...

So, as you can see: WE ARE NOT A SINGLE-ISSUE PARTY! Let the LibLabCon, Marxist, Puppy-worrying Elite just TRY throwing that one at us!

On a personal level, I ALSO made the HISTORIC ANNOUNCEMENT that I shall be standing for the constituency of BARKING in next year's GENERAL ELECTION!

Mr Richard Barnbrook, who had previously been lined up to fight for the seat, is ONLY TOO PLEASED to step aside and let the BETTER MAN take up the cudgels!

As I had PLEDGED EARLIER, when I said I would be fighting with ALL MY (considerable!) MIGHT in the (Thurrock) constituency, I firmly believe (Thurrock) to be winnable, and I KNOW that EVERY MAN-JACK OF THE STURDY PATRIOTS OF (Thurrock) WILL BE BEHIND ME ALL THE WAY!

Let “ONWARDS AND UPWARDS” be our rallying cry!

That and “Cash and Cheques to the usual address...”

OUR HISTORIC CONFERENCE: A BRIEF RESPITE FROM THE GRAVITAS!

2009-11-15T02:25:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

Busy reshaping our GREAT PARTY at the moment (report later!), so just a short post by way of illustrating that it's not ALL HIGH – LEVEL STATESMANSHIP and POLITICAL THEORY OF THE HIGHEST POSSIBLE INTELLECTUAL LEVEL within our BAND OF BROTHERS!

There's always time for FUN as well!

During Andrew Brons' speech, outlining his proposed amendment to the New Constitution under which all Members will be required to wear CAPS, SMART BROWN SHIRTS, LEATHER BANDOLIERS and RIDING BOOTS (like his), Simon Darby was fiddling with his new iPhone.

He has been “downloading” “APPS”, and seemed very pleased with one that produces “3D Writing”.

“This one's for you”, he said in an aside as he “texted” the above image to me - “just to show what we all think of you!”

He must know that, due to my monocular visual condition, I'm currently unable to de-cypher these “Magic Eye” things, but it's the thought that counts!

Perhaps (after you've clicked on the image to enlarge it) you'll have better luck!

A NEW PARTY IS BORN! SPECIAL OFFER TO OUR LOYAL MEMBERS!

2009-11-14T12:00:00.000-08:00

Click for Full-Size!

GLASGOW NORTH - EAST: WE WON! (very nearly)

2009-11-13T02:03:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

It was another GREAT DAY for our party in the Glasgow North – East by election!

To quote Mark Collett – our party's MAN OF LETTERS: “Never before, in the fields of human constituencies, has so much been owed by so many people to just one group of people”!

Not only did we BEAT the MIGHTY BEHEMOTH that is the “Jury Team”, but we also VANQUISHED the ALL - CONQUERING “Scottish Greens”, the GIANT THREAT of “Independent” and the CANDIDATE – CRUSHING JUGGERNAUT represented by “The Independents Labour & Tory”.

And all we had to do to achieve this HISTORIC RESULT, UNEQUALLED IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF HISTORIC RESULTS, was to throw our GREAT PARTY'S ENTIRE RESOURCES at the constituency, and put EVERYTHING at the service of our GREAT CANDIDATE, the jocular, rotund and affable COMMITTED LOYALIST and POPULAR LOCAL bigot, Charlie Baillie.

You will all now JOIN with Charlie, I'm sure, in REPAYING, at the earliest possible opportunity, the DEPOSIT HE LOST.

This, plus the COSTS INCURRED in transporting our CRACK TEAM OF LEADING PARTY LUMINARIES to and from the constituency, and the associated accommodation expenses, plus the cost of a new iPhone for our DEPUTY LEADER, is BUT A SMALL PRICE TO PAY for the warm glow of PRIDE and PATRIOTIC SATISFACTION in a JOB WELL DONE that SWEPT THE NATION as our GREAT CANDIDATE came in fourth. Behind a gay Tory in Glasgow's poorest area.

TIME IS SHORT, so send CASH ONLY.

Or there may be another Membership leak.

SPECIAL APPEAL: THE DAVID LOONY FIGHTING FUND!

2009-11-11T13:43:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

The time has come, as a party of GREAT BRITISH PATRIOTS, to come to the aid of one of our number!

Mr DAVID LOONY, who stood as a candidate for Suffolk in the recent European election (that I WON), has been arrested and committed to trial on various TRUMPED – UP CHARGES by the LIBLABCON ELITE, following orders issued from the SECRET BUNKER of the CHIEF MARXIST RABBLEROUSER HIMSELF, David Cameron.

I have met the charming Mr Loony on several occasions. He has his eccentricities (he once introduced me to “my wife and my sister” - and there was only one woman there!), but they're GREAT, BRITISH eccentricities!

Mr Loony has, for many years, lived a quiet, simple life of farming, with his meagre income supplemented by a small business constructing and exporting fine, handcrafted, BRITISH, guillotines, gibbets, gallows and electric chairs to many of our most respected Commonwealth neighbours – Rhodesia, Liberia and Somalia among them.

HOW, I ask you, can this LOVEABLE, BIG – HEARTED, GREAT BRITISH PATRIOT, be harassed and hounded THROUGH THE COURTS, for doing NO MORE than holding A LOVE OF NATION within his STOUT YEOMAN HEART?!

That, and pursuing a HARMLESS PASTIME of collecting “firearms”.

Since WHEN, I ask you, has a gallows – manufacturing Suffolk farmer with a small collection of unregistered pistols, rifles and shotguns constituted a threat to ANYONE?!

The fact that Mr Loony also enjoys passing his time in the construction of ENTIRELY HARMLESS, NOVELTY, EXPLOSIVE DEVICES merely serves to underline the VICIOUS VICTIMISATION he is being subjected to!

In order to fight this, we need your money.

NOW!!

We need to raise SEVERAL THOUSAND POUNDS in order to pay for the finest legal defence – there are some cases that EVEN THE GREAT LEE BARNES LLB HONS would find difficult!

Send your money NOW to the “David Loony Fighting Fund”.

Make cheques payable to me, as it'll save time.

And I FAITHFULLY PLEDGE that we won't drop him like a hot spud if it all goes pear – shaped.

NEW APPEAL: BRITISH HISTORY MONTH!

2009-11-06T06:15:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

It is a PROUD TRADITION in our party that, every November, we celebrate BRITISH HISTORY MONTH, in protest against the LibLabCon Elite BRAINWASHING of OUR NATION'S CHILDREN.

Only last week, I was HORRIFIED to hear from Mr Richard Edmonds, one of our party's ELDER STATESMEN, that children in the London Borough of Peckham are – even as I write – being taught the oh-so-pc-fairytale that LORD HORATIO NELSON was DISABLED, and that, even as he led our GREAT NATION to VICTORY at the BATTLE OF TRAFALGAR SQUARE, he asked one of his Officers, the heroic NORVILLE HARDY, to give him a KISS!

Mr Edmonds went on to explain (in that funny way of his that makes little bits of spittle appear at the corners of his mouth and makes the little veins on his temples go all throbby) that CHILDREN, THE FUTURE OF OUR NATION, are, RIGHT NOW, being asked to believe that WINSTON CHURCHILL was somehow “opposed to fascism” and that his mother was AMERICAN!

We must, I'm sure you'll agree, AS A MATTER OF URGENCY put this situation in order!

And that's why I'm launching this appeal for funds.

Just £10 will pay for a copy of “Zulu”, the classic film starring Sir “Citizen” Caine and Sir “Stanley” Baxter, for the Party Video Resource Library, in Llanrfyl.

Just £100 will pay for a state of the art Betamax DVD stereogram to play it on.

Just £1000 will provide a BRITISH-MADE Samsony Television on which to watch it.

Whether you wish to donate money for the expansion of the Llanerfyl Resource Library, the redecorating of the Llanerfyl Conference Centre and Spare Bedroom, or simply to pay the expenses incurred in having Mr Edmonds rant incoherently at a group of passing teenagers or to have Mr Collett hang around a girl's school and offer his “advice” to the FLOWER OF OUR NATION, send your money to THE USUAL ADDRESS!

NOW!!

LAW REPORT: TRIAL OF THE CENTURY - THE VERDICT!

2009-11-04T06:15:00.000-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

The TRIAL OF THE CENTURY draws to a close. Mr Khalid, the Defendant, has – in a TRAVESTY OF ENGLISH JUSTICE - been found “Not Guilty”, of calling me a “Pasty - Faced White – Ass Honky Mo' Fo'”.

Instead, the Judge ruled that the “Taxi Driver” called me, in fact, a “Stodgy, Pink, S***bag, Nazi, Puppyf***ing, A***bubble”.

My legal team (Lee Barnes LLB Hons) argued VALIANTLY that “Pink” was, in itself, a term of racial abuse, but the Judge – no doubt a LibLabCon voter – chose not to listen to good sense, and refused to overrule the Jury decision (or to find them guilty of Contempt of Court and clap them in irons).

British Justice, it must be said, is the WORST IN THE WORLD!

I'm raising funds for an appeal. Time is of the essence, so SEND CASH.

LAW REPORT: THE TRIAL OF THE CENTURY!

2009-11-02T11:10:00.001-08:00

Fellow Patriots;

In court today at Burnley. FOR THE PROSECUTION, I MIGHT ADD!

A “Taxi Driver” - a Mister Khalid – is up on charges of RACE CRIME against ME, BRITAIN'S GREATEST PATRIOT. Namely, that he did MALICIOUSLY, and with PREMEDITATED AFORETHOUGHTEDNESS (a legal term told me by our Legal Expert, Mr Lee Barnes LLB Hons) call me a “Pasty - Faced White – Ass Honky Mo' Fo'”, on or about the afternoon of November 19th 2008.

In court, the “Taxi” Driver contended, despite copious evidence to the contrary, that he had merely called me a “Fat F******g Nazi W****r”.

Under cross examination, during which the Judge interceded at one point, asking the Taxi “Driver” “are you sure you said “Fat F******g Nazi W****r” - might you have in fact said “Mealy – Mouthed, Lying, Holocaust – Denying, Wonky – Eyed, Pudgy, Malevolent Little S**theel”?”, the “Defendant” dramatically changed his tune, claiming that he might, in fact, have called me a “Thieving, Sanctimonious, Fart – Voiced, Tosser”, or a “Shiny – Faced F*****g A***creeper with a ******** for a ****”.

At which point the two counsels joined BATTLE, with one claiming that I was more like a “****** ******* *** **** *** on a *******”, and the other countering with the legal argument that, under the Queen's Law, I was, in fact, more like a “****”.

BRITISH LAW is, it must be said, STILL the GREATEST IN THE WORLD!

2009-11-01T15:51:00.000-08:00

HOLOCAUST DENIAL: AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT

2009-10-30T06:10:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

Let's get this “Holocaust” business sorted out once and for all...

Now then. I may, or may NOT, have once written in a magazine which I may (or, indeed, may NOT) have edited, that the “Holocaust” never happened.

I may also, or indeed, may NOT also, have once appeared on television saying, or maybe NOT saying that the “Holocaust” never happened.

Indeed, the person who may, or may NOT have appeared on television saying that the “Holocaust” never happened MAY have been an IMPOSTER, possibly hired by the LibLabCon Elite Security Forces to discredit, or possibly NOT to discredit, myself OR someone else.

Which brings me to the point that, regardless of whether I, or SOMEONE ELSE, did or DIDN'T say the “Holocaust” did, or DIDN'T happen, the DRACONIAN, MARXIST, LIBLABCON, VEGETARIAN, FEMINIST ELITE laws, as they stand at the moment (or, indeed, DON'T stand at the moment), ABSOLUTELY FORBID me, or anyone ELSE, stating, once and for all, whether I did, or DIDN'T say the “Holocaust” happened, or DIDN'T happen, or whether I did once believe the “Holocaust” did, or DIDN'T happen, or whether I changed, or DIDN'T change, my opinion on the matter, or, if I DID (or DIDN'T) change (or NOT change) my opinion on the matter, to state any reason WHY. Or why NOT.

I'm glad that's cleared everything up.

IN WHICH I AM EXTREMELY POPULAR NORTH OF THE BORDER:

2009-10-29T05:10:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

Scotland yesterday. So. What happens? Oh yes. I GET BLOODY EGGED! I GET BLOODY EGGED BY THE BLOODY TROTS AND MY BLOODY INCOMPETENT COLLECTION OF THUGS, FANTASISTS AND PERVERTS WHO CALL THEMSELVES MY BLOODY SECURITY TEAM ARE NOWHERE TO BE BLOODY SEEN!

Right. Deep breaths. The Press have been asking why I didn't turn out later that day to visit the Glasgow candidate Charle Baillie to offer my WHOLEHEARTED and UNQUALIFIED support for his forthcoming by – election.

Well, it's easy: I didn't want to OUTSHINE CHARLIE with my WIT, INTELLIGENCE and EASYGOING POPULIST CHARM. Charlie Baillie is an outstanding candidate in his own right; a man of INTEGRITY, GUTS and AN ENORMOUS COLLECTION OF PIPE BAND MUSIC. He will do his party proud, I'm sure, and will EASILY knock another National Party (the Monster Raving Loony Party) into sixth or seventh place.

Obviously, my heroic tour of Scotland – or “Hibernia”, as our Aboriginal ancestors called it – hasn't come cheap.

Now I KNOW there's a degree of loose talk doing the rounds among people who will shortly be expelled from the ranks of our BAND of BROTHERS about the ENTIRELY REASONABLE amount of LEGITIMATE FUNDRAISING I am FORCED to do in order to keep our GREAT BRITISH PARTY on the road to INEVITABLE VICTORY and POWER.

So don't complain, break out the chequebook and DIG DEEP FOR VICTORY!

BORING OFFICE PAPERWORK: EXPENSES

2009-10-27T03:22:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

A day spent in the office filling out expenses claims. It never takes me long. As you all know, I am INFINITELY BETTER than the PIGS OF BRUSSELS when it comes to my expenses.

You will know already that I travel to the HEART OF DARKNESS on a budget ferry, towing a caravan (a 1977 model Swift Excelsior, for those fellow “Vanners” who are interested!) behind the trusty (and BRITISH) old Rover 200, which is where Mr Brons and Yours Truly sleep (in the car park of the British Council offices) during our stays here. (Or “voluntary exile from the sweet air of freedom”, as I prefer to see it.)

I also save money here by having the Good Lady Wife prepare a stock of GREAT BRITISH bloater paste sandwiches for sustenance.

As you can see, this all adds up to my claiming HARDLY ANYTHING from the HEART OF DARKNESS, while other “Members” claim greedily for EVERYTHING, from luxury apartments and nights at lapdancing clubs (whatever THEY might be!) to armfuls of expensive souvenirs and trinkets.

I PLEDGE RIGHT NOW that I will NEVER pocket INDECENT AMOUNTS OF MONEY from TAXPAYERS!

No. That's what Party subscriptions and donations are for.

Cough up.

AN INTERNATIONAL STATESMAN: POSTCARD FROM BRUSSELS

2009-10-26T10:40:00.000-07:00

A busy day in Brussels, representing my Constituents in the North East. Or West. Or wherever.

I had no sooner arrived at THE HEART OF DARKNESS when I bumped into my friend and colleague Mr Brons, admiring himself in the office mirror as he tried on his smart new brown shirt and riding boots. Mr Brons is a character, you know – a GREAT, LOVEABLE, BRITISH ECCENTRIC, if ever there was one!

He's taken to life in Europe like a duck to water, I must say! He's even made many European friends, from Jaroslav Bigot of the Hungarian Christian Racist's Party, to Benito Fascisti of the Catholic Holocaust – Denial Alliance.

With high – quality, internationally respected friends like these, I think you can see why we find ourselves at the VERY HEART of power within Europe!

Mr Brons couldn't stop – he had to meet with some people he described as “a social group”: A bunch of youngsters who like to organise “indoor firework displays” in certain areas of the city. “Sounds dangerous!” I exclaimed, “I hope they know what they're doing!” “Oh yes. They know what they're doing alright...”, he said in that slightly mysterious way of his as he pulled on his Balaclava...

When it comes to SPEECHES in THE HEART OF DARKNESS, I have been helped immeasurably by one of the General Assistants here, Miss Khan – an Algerian young lady.

She – very professionally, I must say, in light of my stated aim of sending her, her family and all others of her “stock” back to whichever Godforsaken Casbah from which they came within a fortnight of my becoming European President – has given me a handy translation guide to writing my speeches in French. (She had previously explained that ALL speeches are to be delivered in that “language”, and the headphones by every seat in the chamber are merely there for the purpose of listening to a “rapper” by the name of “50 Pence”. God forbid!)

Anyway, the speeches delivered with the aid of this handy and gaily – illustrated tome (entitled “Francais Pour La Petit Enfants”) have been an ENORMOUS SUCCESS, received with RAPT STARES and APPRECIATIVE LAUGHTER by my Peers.

In fact, I shall now, for the purposes of this Blog, use the excellent “Google Translate” function so that you can enjoy the WISE WORDS of my MAIDEN SPEECH in ENGLISH.

Here we go...

“Where is John's pen?
Is it on his table?
No. It is not on his table.
Is it in Mother's pocket?
No. It is not in Mother's pocket.
Is it beneath his cat?
No. It is not beneath his cat...”

Bugger.

And I'm willing to bet that “Slimy Fat Spaccy - Eyed Nazi Git” ISN'T Algerian for “Honoured Member”, either...

ANOTHER GREAT BRITISH SUNDAY!

2009-10-25T14:47:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

A GREAT BRITISH Sunday again, but slightly subdued.

For me, the dawn broke in a Herefordshire ditch lying beneath several burly members of my Security Team, having been thrown there late last night in order to escape the EGG – HURLING TERRORISTS of the MARXIST LIBLABCON ELITE and the SINISTER COMMUNISTIC AL – QUAIDA CABAL that are the ROSS – ON – WYE ANTIQUARIAN BOOKSELLER'S ASSOCIATION and the CONSERVATIVE LADIES' FRIENDSHIP FUDDLE.

Not the ideal way to spend the night of the Annual Dinner of the Dunkirk Club, but needs must, and my safety (and, by extension, the FUTURE OF OUR GREAT NATION) is paramount.

Following my customary GREAT BRITISH BREAKFAST at a Little Chef (from the new menu by Mitchell Inns Award – Winning tv chef Charlton Heston – Bloomington!), which consisted of Prune Sorbet and a Medley of Quail Livers washed down with a refreshing Anchovy, Chamomile and Licorice Smoothie, I faced the ordeal of reading the Sunday Papers, or VILE RED HATE RAGS, as I prefer to think of them.

These days, even the once EMINENTLY SENSIBLE DAILY MAIL seems to have turned against us. GONE are the days of REASONED HEADLINES like “Hurrah For The Blackshirts!” - No. These days this once – great “news”paper is full of NAMBY – PAMBY DRIVEL, daring to insult our GREAT BAND OF BROTHERS as we embark on our mission of TAKING THE COUNTRY BACK. Obviously, I prefer to read the Mail online, as MY LOYAL FOLLOWERS, upon receiving their “suggested” online stories for the day, will PAPER the Comments Boards with the PURE, UNVARNISHED TRUTH.

Even the Sunday Telegraph gives me no pleasure anymore, lately becoming VOCIFEROUS in its BILE and HATRED; with APPALLING HEADLINES like “Mr Griffin Occasionally Displays That Which Could Be Construed As A Less Than Tolerent Attitude Toward Representatives Of Differing Ethnicity”.

I shake with the UNALLOYED ANGER OF THE MARTYRED RIGHTEOUS as I read such COMMIE TOMMYROT!

Still. It's Sunday.

A time to relax.

The Good Lady Wife in the kitchen producing one of her PERFECTLY SERVICABLE Sunday Dinners, while I relax in front of the trusty old betamax with my copy of ZULU DAWN, starring Mr “Bert” Lancashire.

Or should I say, “my copy of THREE QUARTERS OF Zulu Dawn”; ever since the Good Lady Wife recorded an episode of “Eldorado” over the beginning of it in 1988.

Ah, Sunday. Ordained by (the CHRISTIAN!) God as a well – earned day of rest before the travails of the week to come.

I will defend Sundays, to my last breath, against the ILLEGAL MEDDLERS OF BRUSSELS!

IT WILL COST A FORTUNE, BUT WE'LL DO IT!!

Usual address. Cheques made out to “Cash”.

Ta.

THE DUNKIRK CLUB ANNUAL DINNER: A GREAT BRITISH NIGHT OUT FOR THE PARTY'S ELITE. AND ME.

2009-10-24T15:30:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

After the excitements of the last few days, a weekend to relax with the CHOSEN FEW of our GREAT PARTY.

Tonight is the annual dinner of our “elite” section of the party – the Dunkirk Club. Members of the Dunkirk Club are those PATRIOTS who go that little further – sending a minimum of £15 a month from their benefits to the Party coffers.

We have a GREAT BRITISH DINNER lined up for tonight (choice of Prawn Cocktail or Melon Balls for the starter, Chicken in a Basket main course – vegetarian option; a Basket - and Angel Delight for dessert with a choice of wines – White AND Red!). The evening also includes a full lineup of TOP – FLIGHT ENTERTAINMENT.

Opening with an Appeal For Funds from yours truly (what can I say?! People have come to expect it, and I'm only here to serve!), we move onto a STIRRING SPEECH from ME. This year's theme being “I'm Worth My Weight In Gold. I Made This Party And I Can Break It And Don't You Bloody Forget It”, followed by an URGENT APPEAL FOR FUNDS from Jim Dowson and rounded off with A REALLY REALLY DESPERATELY HEARTFELT AND MASSIVELY URGENT APPEAL FOR VITAL SUPER EMERGENCY FUNDING from Myself, just by way of ending the evening on a high before we prepare to DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY to the smooth sounds of Joey Smith on the Karaoke. Provided he's remembered to bring the right leads to connect it to the tv this year.

A GREAT NIGHT OUT OF TRUE QUALITY, I THINK YOU'LL AGREE!

You'll understand that, due to the constant attempts of the UAF LIBLABCON MARXIST ELITE FREEMASON PRIORE DE SION KNIGHT'S TEMPLAR CIA SCUM to picket these events, I've been advised to leave the notification of this year's venue to our security team.

That's why NO-ONE will drag out of THIS STOUT ENGLISH BULLDOG that it's happening at the Chase Hotel in Ross – on – Wye.

Bugger.

You can erase these things, can't you?

QUESTION TIME: FEEDBACK FROM THE TROOPS!

2009-10-23T01:36:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

So, “The shouting and the tumult dries”, to quote Mark Collett.

Following my CRUSHING DEFEAT of the ENEMIES OF LIGHT and REASON on Question Time, I feel now would be an opportune time to take stock, and to read a few of YOUR comments as to how BRILLIANTLY WELL everyone thought I did.

Let it NEVER BE SAID that ours isn't a DEMOCRATIC PARTY. In fact, anyone who DARES say so will be INSTANTLY EXPELLED and ALL THEIR PROPERTY FORFEIT, under Special Executive Order 511/SNG, passed by myself at an EMERGENCY QUORUM while I was in the shower the other day.

Anyway: On with an ENTIRELY RANDOM selection of comments visitors to the “I Love Our Glorious Leader And Pledge My Eternal Loyalty To Him” website...

From: M Collett

“Dear Leader, I can honestly say that you are the greatest master of oratory since Cicero. Your masterly handling of this hostile panel of our sworn enemies was the finest display of intellect, wit and political acumen in all of the history of democracy.”

From: P Morris

“Oh Captain, My Captain; I think we all recognise your godlike genius and razor-like political mind, but I, for one, had forgotten just how physically attractive you are – putting me in mind of a cross between a young Errol Flynn and Mr David Beckham at the height of his corporeal perfection. I know you won't take it at all amiss, or read any creepily “homosexual” connotation into it if I admit that I (or my right hand, at any rate!) was quite exhausted after watching you for an hour!”

From: R Phillips

“WOW U WUZ GRATE U RILLY OWNED TEH COMMYS N ETHNICS U R THE GRATEST”

From: A Kemp

“Although marginally disappointed that you didn't attack the other panellists on racial grounds, I was impressed to FINALLY see the lie of the Knights of the Invisible Order of the Ku Klux Klan being a “violent organisation”(!) being nailed once and for all!”

As you can see, it may be possible for a modest man such as myself (and I AM a man – not a SUPERHUMAN BEING, it must be said...) to get BIG – HEADED upon reading such praise. I have, however, found A DISSENTING VOICE. I publish it here in a spirit of fair – mindedness. Let there be no recrimination. I'll get round to that later, following a lengthy (and EXPENSIVE. You may feel moved to HELP WITH THE COSTS...) investigation into the identity of the perpetrator.

From: S Darby

“You were useless. You just sat there like a big, sweaty, gibbering, wonky - eyed git, tittering and twitching like a mentally – challenged, clinically - obese meercat. Let's face it – if we can't even answer questions about racism (which is, after all, what we spend every waking hour thinking of), we might just as well go home. You're an embarrassment. We're f****d.”

Oh well. There will always be dissenting voices, and that's what any HEALTHY DEMOCRACY needs.

Which is why there's no place for it in OUR party!

QUESTION TIME: ON WHICH I WAS UNDOUBTEDLY THE BEST!

2009-10-22T15:56:00.001-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

YOUR LEADER HAS SURVIVED THE LION'S DEN!

Question Time was not JUST a triumph: It will possibly – and I think I can say this without fear of contradiction – GO DOWN IN HISTORY AS HAVING BEEN THE GREATEST TRIUMPH IN ALL OF HUMAN – OR BIOLOGICAL – HISTORY!

Not since Rocky “Sly” Balboa fought Dolphin Lithgow to a standstill in “Rambo 5” or Duke “John” Wayans shouted “Fill your pants you son of a bitch” as he rode into battle in “True Brit”, has ANYONE fought against, and VANQUISHED, such foes as I have faced tonight.

Indeed, if one-time BNP Member Lord Winston Churchill were alive today, he would SURELY have been moved to say “Never before in the field of middlebrow current affairs programming has so much been owed by so many to just one TOWERING LION of a man. And a GENIUS to boot.”

I think, and I'm sure you'll agree, that the operative word Lord Churchill (would have) used here is “owed”.

Unfortunately, my reasonable request for a degree of FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE in getting safely to the TV studio (a tale I shall recount one day – needless to say it involved decoys, subterfuge, a degree of bravery on the part of my crack security team, OUTRIGHT HEROISM on my part, and a nine – hundred yard crawl through a live sewer BENEATH THE VERY FEET OF THE MARXIST LIBLABCON ELITE COWERING STALINIST UAF CAMBERWICK GREEN PROTESTERS!) didn't raise quite as much as I had hoped.

Honestly. An impartial observer might almost suspect that YOU DON'T CARE!

He might suspect that YOU DON'T CARE about my safety.

He might suspect that YOU DON'T CARE about my future.

He might suspect that YOU DON'T CARE about your children.

He might suspect that YOU DON'T CARE about your COUNTRY!

Right. You know what to do.

To the usual address, if you don't mind.

Postal Orders are perfectly acceptable.

THE WAITING GAME...

2009-10-22T13:56:00.001-07:00

* Fellow Patriot * (Whispers)

It's about 2pm, and I've been told to keep very, very quiet in our room at the Shepherd's Bush Trav-O-Tel.

In fact, Simon Darby assured me that it would be best for security if I stayed here, hidden in the linen locker. “Don't forget to let me out! You wouldn't want to lose me!” I smiled, cheerily and full of GREAT BRITISH GOOD HUMOUR.

“Course not...” sighed Simon. You know, he seemed to be doing that sneering thing of his when he said it. But I think we're all very tired.

QUESTION TIME: ZERO HOUR APPROACHES!

2009-10-21T05:17:00.001-07:00

Fellow Patriots:

“It was the bestest of times, it was the worstest of times”, to quote Mark Collett.

The minor upset (more upsetting for the Marxist LibLabCon Elite than for WE PATRIOTS, I might add!) of the annual Membership List leak behind us, we must now concentrate on my appearance, tomorrow night, on QUESTION TIME! Surely, and without the merest hint of a possibility of a word of understatement, THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT TELEVISUAL EVENT IN ALL OF RECORDED HUMAN HISTORY!

Unfortunately, the UAF hooligans of the well – known Marxist David Cameron will be lying in wait at Television Centre, and the STALINIST STORMTROOPERS of the Far Left – The Metropolitan Police Service – have refused to guarantee my safety.

Do you honestly believe, for one moment, that such insurmountable odds would put ME, BRITAIN'S GREATEST PATRIOT, off?

Not a bit of it.

Simon Darby has already looked into the possibility of hiring a helicopter from a friend of his (Honest Harry Collier's Helicopter, Limousine and Bouncy Castle Hire, Ltd), but we now find that even the Civil Aviation Authority are a part of the AXIS OF EVIL, and were bleating about “you can't go landing a bloody great chopper on the road in the middle of Shepherd's Bush!” or some such lily – livered pinko hogwash.

(Note to self: Enshrine right to land helicopters on the road in the middle of Shepherd's Bush as central plank of Party Transport Policy. They can't accuse US of a lack of sophisticated, joined – up political thinking!)

My next thought was to hire a special secret agent car that can go all invisible and shoot rockets out, as driven to great effect by Mr Piers Bronson in the “James Bond” motion picture, “Die Another Time”.

A few phonecalls revealed that the aforementioned “car” was, in actual fact, make – believe: A “Special Effect” apparently produced by strapping mirror tiles to a Rover Princess.

Therefore, in the same TRUE BRITISH SPIRIT that coursed through the STOUT, BRITISH VEINS of the 139 BRITISH heroes of Rorke's Drift, the 179 BRITISH defenders of the Alamo, the handful of stout BRITISH defenders of Helms Deep and President Bill Pullman in Independence Day, I – your FEARLESS LEADER – will use CUNNING and GUILE to gain safe entry to the HEART OF DARKNESS!

Employing a “Natty Dread Fun Wig”, dark glasses and an Afghan Coat, I shall DISGUISE myself, mingle with the EVIL UAF HORDES outside and then, when the coast is clear, DASH FOR THE MAIN ENTRANCE!

WHAT CAN POSSIBLY GO WRONG?!

Of course, this – plus travel from Welshpool, B & B, etc – could EASILY run into SEVERAL HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS.

And that is why I need YOU to DIG DEEP! DIG AS YOU HAVE NEVER DUG BEFORE! Dig deep to raise the money we need to wipe the sleazy grin off the faces of the LibLabCon Marxist Zog Lizardman Dalek Elite!

Send your money NOW to:

Special-Get-Me-To-The-BBC-In-One-Piece-Fund
Llaffing
Allthew Aytothebank
Welshpool
Gwent

Make cheques payable to “Cash”

MEMBERSHIP LEAK - A MORE CONSIDERED OFFICIAL STATEMENT

2009-10-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

Right. Got it.

THE MEMBERSHIP LIST IS A HOAX!

That's it. No, Really. IT'S A HOAX! NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT!

Even though all of you, my FELLOW PATRIOTS, will find that YOUR names and YOUR phone numbers are on it, rest assured - THE MEMBERSHIP LIST IS A HOAX!

It's such a fiendish hoax, of course – transparently the work of the LibLabCon Marxist Cyberman Flying Monkey Elite – that they have been cunning enough to ensure that this PATENTLY OBVIOUS TISSUE OF FALSEHOODS includes the details of every GREAT BRITON in our GREAT BRITISH PARTY!

So nothing to worry about, then.

In fact, I'm sure that you will be so RELIEVED to discover that IT'S A HOAX, that you'll want to buy an official “I'M PROUD TO BE ON THE LIST THAT SOME IDIOT ALLOWED TO BE LEAKED” tee shirt!

A SNIP AT £25!

Cheques (or cash – which always comes in handy!) to the usual address. You know the score.

MEMBERSHIP LEAK: AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT

2009-10-19T16:01:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

Oh, for CHRIST'S SAKE!

They ABSOLUTELY PROMISED that the list was SAFE!

It was all going to be so SIMPLE this time. The list would be kept on ONE server, and only a few – well, less than a thousand, at any rate – HIGHLY TRUSTED PARTY OPERATIVES would have access.

We would all have our own passwords, and our I.T Expert - Young Peter - sent a VERY IMPORTANT email around reminding everyone to use a good password that couldn't easily be guessed.

I took him at his word: Even if some Evil, Marxist, LibLabCon, ZOG – Inspired, Islamic, Feminazi TRAITOR TO OUR GLORIOUS NATION (or irritated BNP Official) were to find my “Secret Question”, they'd be none the wiser.

After all, how many people (besides, perhaps, a Cambridge University Graduate with a good degree in Middle – Management) would even have HEARD of the man who was Chancellor of Germany from 1933 to 1945?

LIFE IN WELSHPOOL

2009-10-19T12:29:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

A word about Welshpool: I am, of course, the MOST POPULAR RESIDENT of this town. Modesty prevents my expanding too much on the love and respect my fellow residents hold for me, but a single anecdote will serve as an illustration...

Our family Doctor is an Asian lady – Dr Patel. Now then, given my avowed intent to deport her and her family within months of becoming Prime Minister, it might be fair to assume that she would treat me with some disdain. Not a bit of it! When I was elected to the European Parliament, she was professional enough to write, pointing out that I would require a full course of inoculations before crossing the Channel.

Sheer professionalism! And a great example of someone able to show great respect to a superior!

(I can't help wishing the year's worth of treatment were over, however – the monthly course of injections into my bottom and the constant round of enemas and suppositories are beginning to get me down...)

A minor issue I have with Welshpool – and one I have raised repeatedly with the Town Clerk – is that I assume the Town's dog mess bins must be of a similar design to the trusty BRITISH mail box I keep at the end of the drive for our deliveries.

How else would one explain the “surprises” I so often find when collecting the morning's post!?

THREE (BRITISH) CHEERS FOR THE GREAT BRITISH SUNDAY!

2009-10-19T07:40:00.000-07:00

To Church, and a wonderful CHRISTIAN service (although no-one can be sure how much longer the LibLabCon Marxist Elite will allow such things to continue without the spectre of “Multiculturalism” being forced upon us...) at the Reverend Robert West's Church of the Blessed St Enoch, Ltd.

The church meets in the Reverend West's living room, at the moment, as the So – called “Archbishop” of Canterbury has repeatedly turned down our entirely reasonable demands to give the Reverend a parish of his own, usually coming up with some feeble excuse about the Reverend “not being a real vicar”, or some such communistic twaddle.

Anyway, a living room, especially a GREAT BRITISH living room, is good enough for stout – hearted British Patriots at the moment, especially as, besides the Reverend, there were just the Good Lady Wife and myself.

After a rousing hymn (“Onward, Ethnically Indigenous, British, Christian Soldiers”), accompanied by the Reverend West on his Mitzigotchi Karaoke unit, and the first (of six) passings of the collection plate, we were treated to a reading from the Book of Enoch (“...and the Lord did look upon the Indigenous British, and was He well pleased...”) and a two – hour sermon on the evils of religious fundamentalism, followed by a plea of support for the Reverend's American sister church – The Southern Baptist Holy Rolling Sepulchre of White Supremacy and Death to Darwinists, Inc.

Call me a Traditionalist if you like, but a GREAT BRITISH visit to a GREAT BRITISH church is the perfect way to start a Sunday.

(The CHRISTIAN) God bless you!

QUESTION TIME: A DAY OF INTENSIVE COACHING!

2009-10-19T07:24:00.000-07:00

Fellow Patriots;

Question Time is just around the corner, and today was spent in intensive coaching from Simon Darby (my Deputy Leader), our legal expert Lee Barnes (LLB. Hons), and Arthur Kemp.

Arthur is our resident intellectual (although not THAT intellectual: He once told me he was a Rhodesian, but I guessed immediately that he was joking – he's WHITE!!) think tank leader, and author of “Clash of the Titans” - a 30,000 page history of racism which was – I believe, made into a rather good film a few years ago starring those great British actors Sir “Larry” Oliver, Dame “Maggie” Dench, Sir Guy Burgess - Meredith and Sir “Harold” Hamlyn. You can read volume one - “Curtain Twitching Bigotry From The Pelleponesian Wars to Croydon” on the internet for free! (although I'd rather you bought it from our online bookshop for a mere £49.99 a volume. Or all three volumes for just £250!)

Anyway; we set up the paste table and Mark set out a name card reading “Nick Griffin” (or “Nik Grifon” according to the card) he'd printed with his John Bull Printing Set. He said something about invoicing me for it later.

I took my place and my Fellow Patriots fired questions at me.

Arthur set the ball rolling: “You deny being Nazis, Mr Griffin. How would you respond to this charge?”

“Since when was it “Nazi” to hold a simple belief in the total racial superiority of the Aryan People over lesser beings?” I responded. We all agreed that such an answer was both brilliant and unarguable.

Simon came next. “In view of the abject failure of every British Government in history to address the needs of the British people, do you agree that you would be the finest leader our great nation has ever known, and would usher in a golden age undreamed of in our history since the glorious days of Queen Elizabeth the First (as played by Miss Cate Blanchett)?”

I had expected my colleagues to be tough on me, and Simon didn't let me down. (You know; I feel sorry for Simon in a way – there's a sort of sarcasm that enters his voice whenever he speaks of me like that. It's not much, I know – but it's the kind of unfortunate vocal mannerism that will, I fear, always prevent him from reaching the same dizzying heights of political power that I have attained.)

I answered that I agreed fully. As one would with such an eminently reasonable statement.

Next came Mark. “What is your position concerning the treatment of paedophiles? Well, not “paedophiles”, as such, but, say, someone who might be in his thirties and might be with a friend at some conference or other and who might, quite innocently, try and get a couple of underage girls who honestly looked older, I'm telling you, up to his room?”

“Our position on paedophiles is both firm, yet fair”, I responded. “I would have to consult the “Rabid Comments” section of our Party Website to canvass this week's official position on the matter, but I can assure you that we would deal with such a case vigorously. Possibly involving stoning, or something.”

Mark seemed satisfied with my brilliant answer, if strangely subdued.

Lee Barnes (LLB Hons) came last: “Will you pledge your party, as a matter of urgency, to demanding full disclosure of the facts surrounding Area 51, Roswell and the contact between successive U.S Governments and Aliens from the constellation of Ursa Major?”

“Ur, yes. Okay.” I responded. We've long since found that it's best not to argue with Lee Barnes (LLB Hons). Besides: The Good Lady Wife has only just cleaned the stains off the the crushed – dralon effect settee from when I refused to give him my promise that we would immediately denounce Peter Hain as All-Powerful Zionist Leader of the Secret Cult of Marxist Lizardmen.

So. After a grilling like that we were all agreed that I'm not just firing on all cylinders, but I will undoubtedly triumph on Question Time, and that the entire country will fall under my spell.

This time next year I will be Prime Minister. I know it.

WELCOME TO MY NEW BLOG!

2009-10-19T06:00:00.000-07:00

Welcome, Dear Fellow Patriot, to my NEW BLOG. Unlike my “Official” Blog, this is designed to concern itself more with my private thoughts and musings.

Thank (the CHRISTIAN!) God for Blogs! At last, a safe haven for decent, like – minded and PATRIOTIC Brits to converse, share and muse! A great BRITISH invention, as well – invented by the great BRITISH inventor Sir – Tim Bernie Leach at CERNE ABBAS, in BRITAIN.

You know, there's nothing I like better than to sit at my roll – top mahogany – effect Empire writing desk with a good strong mug of BRITISH tea (or a foaming ALE!!) and look out across the rolling Welshpool countryside as I write a GREAT BRITISH BLOG: In ENGLISH, mind you – although I'm sure that will soon be a crime under the hideous and draconian laws of the EHRC and the LibLabCon elite!

In fact, I shall, here and now, PLEDGE to you – my Fellow Patriots – that I shall resist ALL ATTEMPTS to force me to write my blog in any other language!

Yes! Never will you read here any blog entry in Urdu, or Swahili, or French!

Of course, such a fight will cost money – lawyers aren't cheap! DIG DEEP, my Fellow Patriots! DIG DEEP and send your donations to the usual address!

WE WON'T LOSE THIS ONE!!